1. Hello Clefers, I'm new here and seeking for insight.
Welcome, Phriimahn. Let's take a walk.
2. I have been dating this girl for a year (late 2016 to late 2017). We've had alot of memories: bad times and moments together, but the bond was strong.
The bond was strong? Great. Or you mean, the bond wasn't strong?
3. Fast forward to September last year, we both got admitted into different universities.
This is where hidden problems will start. Let's watch and see.
4. We both chose to make it work despite the distance by her visiting regularly, but late October, we had an ish where I complimented a picture of her friend (who looked doper than her) and I believed jealousy set in and she had beef with me for 3 days.
Visiting each other regularly? Anything dating that happens regularly is bad. She's just like most women. Always jealous when compliment goes to the other person. Nothing bad yet other "visiting regularly."
5. I apologized but due to a tight schedule I couldn't communicate with her to clear the beef well.
You apologized? How did you do it? Did you use the word "sorry?" if yes, your problems has officially started
6. Two days after the apology, she posted something on WhatsApp that had to do with her changing her thoughts on us and the future of the relationship, then she deleted it some minutes later thinking I didn't see it but I did. I didn't let her know I saw it.
Great. Maturity display.
7. In my mind, I interpreted it TO MYSELF that this relationship is a lost cause and started ignoring her for the rest of October and November.
Good you started the ignoring first. It's powerful.
8. During this period, we spoke briefly — not more than 10 times.
You spoke? Who initiated the chat? The person is the one investing more.
9. Then December 1st, she sent a breakup note that in a way looked fake saying she didn't know what she did and wasn't sure she wanted to know anymore, but it's over.
Great. You should not reply if you want her to yearn for you. Let's see if you did.
10. I read it twice, didn't shake, didn't bother, typed back my reply agreeing to the breakup. My reply was more emotionally damaging than hers.
You shouldn't have replied. It's good you didn't shake or become bothered. Why? Why did you emotionally damage her? We don't support this.
11. Funny enough, I told her what she did and closed the doors on the relationship.
You're acting bittered and it's bad. It's good you closed the door unlike Mr. Nice guys.
12. We didn't contact each other throughout December. I ignored her birthday and matriculation posts.
If you were still single during this period, you're doing yourself because this long time will make you miss her. If someone else has taken over, you wouldn't bother. Great you ignored those wishes.
13. She messaged me middle of some weeks ago to tell me she needed to know when I'll be back on holiday so we'd meet up to enable her collect her things that were with me.
If she comes, don't say a word. Help her pack her things and when you notice she's close to the bed, grab her and kiss her passionately, then throw her on the bed and kiss her more. Stop and let her go — it's not a rape. When she gets home, she'll remember that kiss and will reach out soon.
14. Though, I still like her and we have this unspoken vibe. I'm considering pulling strings to get us back again.
The two of you are playing the same game. Everyone on earth has ego, and both of you are no exception. What you're considering is exactly what she's considering as long as you've pressed her ESCOFi buttons during the time you guys where together.
If you hadn't pressed it and she had moved on with a guy who knows how to press them, then forget it. The reasons you're thinking of bringing her back are:
1. You don't have a new girlfriend since then.
2. You miss the Sëx she gave.
3. You invested more emotions despite being the one playing the game. You gamed yourself.
4. You're horny. When a man is in the mood, he thinks of getting anything back.
15. What do you think about this situation?
It's not a difficult situation. You made most of the mistakes. It seems as the drama was happening, you didn't preoccupy your heart with another woman, but school work.
You apologized to her. It good to apologize when you're wrong, but you should've apologized with humor without using the keyword "sorry."
You can use sorry in business, with your fellow men, with women you don't have any intent for, but when it comes to your woman, using a playful way to apologize is better.
So, what do we think about your situation? Use another line (WhatsApp) to ChatDict her. If you had ChatDicted this girl, she would've been the one to reach out. It seems you didn't press her mumu buttons like a GMC. This is probably why she hasn't reached out. Love do fade, but properly pressed ESCOFi buttons don't.
At this point, I'll say you're acting like a nice guy. You unknowningly invested more emotion while acting tough like a good-bad guy without doing the ground work of making her addicted to you.
Move on or ChatDict her as if you're a stranger via another number. Ask questions for more explanations on anything.